Day One Hundred-Nine

Vin got a used 2 dollar, right, platform pedal for his bike so he could ride with his cast thing and we rode the a big 22 miles on the Stowe bike path then got coffee.  Other than driving with him in the passenger seat, I enjoy being his nurse.
I walked Max who, pretending to be unaware of my recent simultaneous bilateral total knee replacements, pulls way too hard.
I'm doing my stretching exercises 2x a day like I'm supposed to and today I started to feel like the right leg soft tissue is loosening up.

Day One Hundred-Seven

Bet you didn't think you'd hear from me again so soon.

Still trying to figure out how to deal with my knees being at such different stages in the healing process.  If I only needed one leg to walk I'd be all set.  The left, post-cortisone, is pretty much perfect...still painful when it seems like it should be and never for very long.  The right one still feels like cut glass.  Yes, it responds to PT...but by feeling worse instead of better.  And not just for a little while...the whole day.  We can't figure out how to increase flexion.  The soft tissue seems really really really tight.  Stubborn.  You'd think stretching would loosen it up but it doesn't.  If I can deal with the guilt, I'm going to take a day off from walking Max and see how it feels.  Sorry Max.  I'll cook you a free-range, local, organic steak and take you swimming.

Rode 2 hours from home with a few rollers, walked Max, babied Vince and his toe.  Did good PT and lots of icing.  Was able to be in the moment all day without really trying.  I have a lot for which to be thankful.

Me, 107 days ago.  What a babe.  Maybe I should stop complaining about 'no progress'.

Day One Hunded-Six

Does he look nervous to you?

Even this bothers me.

Just wanted to let you know that 'Kathy's New Knee' is still kickin' and that was recently thrust into the roll of caregiver Thursday when Vince had a cheilectomy*.  So now he's on the (my) couch and (my) crutches while I'm doing relatively everything else.  The old switcheroo. 

Up until his surgery I was under no pressure to stop thinking I needed to be convalescing and while I'm careful to not appear completely independent and healed, I realize that I'm getting around pretty well.  Seems I was forced into turning the corner and didn't even know it.

*******

I don't know how this is supposed to work.  Like tonight, I wanted to ice my knees and my gel ice packs were melted because 'you know who' had used them and not put them back in the freezer (or maybe I'm supposed to do that).  Anyway.  

and for the record...I was (am) a much better/easier patient than him.

*he was awake and talking through the whole surgery...that's where were different.

Vince took my spot.

Day Niney-Seven

A flat one hour ride on the Northampton bike path with no one chasing or recognizing me was a perfect prelude to sitting in the car for 4 1/2 hours with a bag of frozen pearl onions on my right knee.  I can't say that the any of the pain I am still experiencing is excruciating but my level of discomfort is very high.  Especially the right knee,* lower back and hips (I've read the back and hip pain is not completely uncommon after total knee replacements and I'm not complaining, just informing).   

No one is scolding me for not doing my PT stretches today but still I feel lazy and guilty.  I'm such a burden to myself. 

I'm thinking I'll take some time off from the right knee flexion stretching even though all the books tell me it's that would be a bad idea.  How can that 'discomfort' (I get sick of the work 'pain') be good when it is almost intolerable?

Suffered through a 15 minute walk, each way, for coffee with Vince and our niece Olivia.  If walking hadn't been the pragmatic way to the coffee shop, driving would have had my vote...which also makes me feel lazy and guilty.  I used to love walking everywhere but now I dread it* and can't imagine doing it for fun.  Discomfort from the first step.  Achy not sharp.  Difficult (impossible?) to ignore.  Feels like normal lingering discomfort that will gradually disappear but right now it's frustrating.

Some days I'm thrilled with my progress and other days the same progress just pisses me off.

*I like that the act of walking is possible for me but even on days when it may sound like I enjoy it, the enjoyment is combined with dread and hate.

Day Ninety-Six

Did a nostalgic 20 mile ride today that felt hillier than I remember.

It would be so easy to accidentally forget to do the flexion exercises on the right knee.

Day Ninety-Five

I was riding faster than I wanted to knowing Vince would be turning off the bike path in a couple miles to head for the hills leaving me to ride any old pace I wanted.  He turned off and about the time I caught my breath I heard someone behind me.  A woman with an IPOD and cleavage that I wasn't going to let pass me was riding my exact 'faster than I wanted to ride' speed.  I didn't stop when I got to Maple Street, timing my crossing so I knew she'd have to stop...but the daredevil didn't stop either.  Breathing hard enough to hear myself, I sneaked a peek behind me at the top of the two mile rise past Amherst College.  I didn't see her but you never know, she could be just out of site, so even though I slowed a little I still had to go faster than I wanted.  I'd never forgive myself if she suddenly showed up right around the corner behind me.  I got to the end and decided she must have turned off somewhere.  Now I could lollygag.  Just then, leaning around the corner on a 16 pound racing bike, was someone I recognized.  I made a quick calculation.  Acquaintances more than friends, it had been so long since we'd seen each other that pretending I didn't recognize him was perfectly believable.  Then, "Kathy?"  "Oh Hi."  A minute later I was trying to remember his name as we were rode side by side.  When he didn't turn off where I knew his house was I figured he planned on riding with me, faster than I wanted, all the way to the end...and then he turned...two seconds before Vince rode up behind me in a big gear.

Walked with Vince and Max at Bear Swamp.  My downhills were pathetic.

Did 2 sets of stretching exercises, taking it easy on the right flexion stretches since it still feels a little too much like cut glass.

Day Ninety-Four

Time for a picture.  Max surprised me when he jumped up on my 3 1/2 foot high convalescing bed for protection while I was doing PT during a thunderstorm.

Rode 2 hours from the house today with some hills and lots of good smells.

Now my right knee hurts way more than my left.  Can't tell if it's actually more painful than ever (which would be bad) or it just seems that way and it's really a little better (which would be good) but I can't tell because the knee I was comparing it to (left) got a cortisone shot and messed up my whole measuring system.

Got out of the car after sitting 2 1/2 hours and noticed that it took less than the 15 minutes it used to take for my strides to consistently measure more than 6 inches.