Two Days

Moving forward with the set-up, I located a walker and a commode.
I'm really feeling a sense of community with all of the 70+ locals who have had knee replacements.  Everyone is being so helpful.  One brought over a couple Aircast circulating ice water knee things for me to use and told me to keep her phone number by the bed in case I need help. Another was in town and picked up a couple of gel packs for me. 
I'm doing nagging odds and ends around the house because I don't want to have them hanging over my head when I can't do them.
Today Elinor was walking down the road next to the ski trail.   "How is it today?" she yelled to me when I skied by.  Well of course I thought she was asking about my knee and I went into this long boring scenario, comparing it to yesterday, how I think the boot/ski combination I have on is good...  Then she said "I meant how is the skiing?"
I think my surgery timing is good.  Skiing will be almost done.  Lots of ice and tree litter on the trails right now.
I was just looking at the weather for the days I am in the hospital.  Surgery day is sort of rainy but the day after is cloudless and warm.  I was bummed when I saw that since I'll have to be inside.  Isn't that stupid?
In 25 hours I won't be able to have anything to eat until after the surgery.  I feel like I am going to have some kind of meltdown.

Three Days

Only 2 more ski days left. :(  Skied 2 1/2 hours in the sun today.  Maybe 55 degrees.  I used my waxless skies and skate boots so I was ready for anything.  No knee issues today.
Got lots of good wishes from people that thought I was getting new knees today.  Carol Waters called and we compared pre-op for bi-lateral acl vs. bi-lateral knee replacement.  I keep forgetting that I am going in for petella femoral replacement and not total knee replacement (hopefully).  Very different in my mind.
Spent time looking for a walker to rent or borrow.  The hospital will 'give' me one but then I'll have a walker to store forever.
Talked to the CPM (continuous passive motion) machine people.  The hospital pharmacist called to go over meds.  I called my primary to ask about treating my pre-op irrational fear.  She said I would have to see me in order to prescribe something or I could take Benedryl.  I saw somewhere that listening to music can work too.  I told her I would just have Vince knock me out before he put me in the car that day.   Read over the joint book.   Everyone talks about preparing the house for when you come home but it already seems prepared other than moving the bed into the living room.  I guess I'll want a walker basket if I can get my hands on a walker.  I think I'll be able to use a metal chair in the shower.  I'll need a bedside table the right size and height.  It would be good if I could find a rocking chair.  Guess it works on range of motion and flexibility automatically....I can see that.  Seems like most of that stuff can be organized when I get home.  I suppose I should think about food but I just don't feel like it.  Maybe that should be tomorrow's project.  We'll see.
I addressed the rest of the xmas cards and gathered a few things to mail that I've been putting off.
Now all I have to do is wait.

Five Days

Skied 1:25.  Highland Lodge.  Last time I skied there (a month ago) I had to be snowmobiled out so today was better.
Friends that think I'm still scheduled for Monday are calling to wish me luck.
I am sort of looking forward to convalescing on the guest bed we move to the living room.  It's a sunny cheerful spot.
Cleaned up the house a bit with no extra swelling.
I thought of only having 4 ski days left and it made me cry.

Twelve Days

Skied the grand tour with friends Ed and Linda.  Iced up a ton with already slow skis which is never good for an arthritic knee.  Wimped out and took a pain killer (5/325) before bed.
I'm not sure I'd really ever looked at my body in a full length mirror before but today I did.  I noticed my right knee was a bit knocked and my right hip was skewed.  I'm pretty sure I was straight up and down until around now.  I had Vin photograph that part of me so I can send it to the doc.  Is that weird?  If I email it to him will he think it's porn?  Was thinking I could photoshop a four leaf clover or something over the crotch area.  Whatever...I don't think I'm going in for my fix a minute too soon.
Walking is awkward and pathetic.  Crutches help.

I missed Sixteen Days and then some

Days 16 thru 13.
Day 16.  Had a 7:30 visit with the pre-op nurse, that was supposed to be yesterday but had to be re-scheduled because the ortho clinic was running late and I couldn't be two places at once, who asked me all the questions I had answered on a questioner two weeks ago.   Then she sent me to have an EKG, chest x-ray, blood and urine test.  I think I skied but I'm not sure since one day last week my knee wouldn't let me but I can't remember which one.
Day 15 nothing that much different than any other day except for when I started to ski down Elinor's Field and my right ski came off.  That was interesting.  A cartwheel followed by a belly flop and a vision of me laying there forever.  But I did get up...and I did decide not to continue down Elinor's.
Day 14 skied out to Windridge with friends Ed and Linda and no knee incidents worth mentioning other than not being able to find a comfortable sleeping position that night.
Day 13 skied Sam's with friends Ed and Linda then again with Vin.  All good.  Picked up a prescription that I called in yesterday.  Didn't need another tossy turny night.

Seventeen Days

I'm just making up the day numbers now.

February 23 I had a GREAT ski before we drive south to the Hartford airport.  No pain.   Then February 24 we flew to Tallahassee for a MFA film school interview.  That made me nervous since I knew that the student's average age was 25 and even with perfect knees I was giving something up being 55.  My strategy was to not use my crutches and not mention my new knee with the interviewers.  If for some reason they asked why I was limping I would just say that I sprained my knee skateboarding.

While in Northampton I had my teeth cleaned at my real dentist's office.  They all knew about the what they consider arrogant orthopedic surgeons vs. the dental profession (I knew they would) and assured me that a cleaning 19 days before surgery was OK.

Before we flew out on Sunday, February 26 I rode the stationary bike with both legs for 35 minutes.  Seemed good.  I was able to retain my exit row seats by convincing the flight attendants I was just transporting the crutches.  Bear in mind that I was fully capable of assisting with the exit in case of an emergency and I wasn't endangering everyone else on the flight just so I could have more leg room.

Twenty-Four Days

Skied 2:15 today and the knees are pretty much OK.  Incredible by the way.  Took a half of a meloxicam and iced when I got back.  I think the the pain I have now is from being on them in the house too much....packing to go to NYC which will be interesting.  I know I'll be OK just not sure what contortions I'll have to go through to be OK.  I'm flexible and have warned the girlfriends about my crutches etc.  Good thing they are used to me and my quirks.
I wasn't going to, but I called the doc to have a vicoden prescription called-in in case of an emergency.  I'd hate to get into a #10 on the pain scale situation in NYwithout any.  Shouldn't have waited until today to call them in since it may not give them enough time to turn them around.  I really doubt I'll need them but I'm a little nervous.

Twenty-Nine Days

Twenty-nine days seems so many fewer than thirty. 

Skate skied 2:45.  I was tired but my knee felt great the whole time.  I got my pulse up.  Feel like my quads got some exercise so they maybe they won't be so pathetic when I try to recover from the surgery.
Slept without taking a 5/325 vicoden like I have been.  Was uncomfortable and took forever to get to sleep since pain is more obvious at night.  Will probably take one tonight.

Friday I drive my rental car to the airport (90 minutes to Burlington) and fly to NYC.  Pretty ambitious. I'm a little anxious but my knee has been so good...

Thirty-One Days

Carefully did some housework this morning.  When I say carefully I mean like vacuuming sitting down.  Was good.  Last night I had some weird sharp pains in my left knee when I turned a few times.  Not when I turned oddly, just when I turned.  The doc addressed the sharp pains a month ago...there is a top and bottom.  When 'they're' good they fit together and run smoothly and when they're bad, they don't fit together because they've worn differently.  I can sort of picture that I guess.

I'm still trying to figure out why I'm so pain free.  I took half of a meloxicam after vacuuming sitting down and that's it.

Skied 2 1/2 hours.   Mid-30's and sun.  NO KICK but managed to not slip which is good because I decided that is what immobilizes me.  Propelled myself with my arms and enjoyed every second.

Monday I have a pre-op evaluation for the knee replacement with my primary care doc.  I'll just keep moving forward and pretty soon I'll be dancing.

Thirty-Two Days

Parked the car by the bridge at the end of Young Road so I wouldn't have to go down any hills unless I wanted.  Good idea.  Double poled in the sun for an hour and a half.  It was fast but I made sure I didn't slip and that did the trick.  And guess what?  I realized that I could snow plow if I had to with no repercussions.  Even with all of these new conclusions and even though it would be in my nature....I'm not going to push it.   I doubt my heart rate is ever over 100 but being outside is good stuff for the old head.
I still use my crutches to keep weight off the knee...mostly to keep the swelling down so I'm able to get out every day.  I look so forward to that time.  Lately, but before I was couch ridden, I would try and get some exercise everyday but I'd do it mostly just to get it over with.  Now I actually really look forward to it.  Everything changes when you identify and stop taking things for granted.  So, my knee....which could have been perceived as a TOTAL disaster, ended up spawning this incredible benefit.  (this is my attitude when it is sunny).
The baker cyst is still missing and I'm in almost no pain at the moment.
If a fit upper body helps with knee replacement recovery, I'll be dancing in a week.
Until tomorrow.

Thirty-Three Days

Today was good.  Got 1 1/2 hours of double poling in.  Mostly stayed sitting the rest of the time.   Plus.  I looked and my baker cyst is gone.  What the?  Can't say I miss it.  Maybe that's why the pain has been at such a low level lately.
When I'm painless I space out for a second and think that I don't have to have it done.  Then I remember how immobile I am whether I'm painless or not.  I think I'm a little bummed when I'm sitting here pain-free because everyone I've talked to says the best thing about having a knee replaced is that now they are pain-free.  Shit.  What is going to be my 'best thing'?  I hope there will be some huge difference.
That's about it for today.

Thirty-Four Days

Awoke to a knee that is as good as it gets these days.  It was going to be in the 40's so I waited until late morning when it got slow.  I planned an ambitious ski and headed north into the hills.  I got about 2 km, slipping like crazy.  THAT (slipping) is the culprit.  The happy knee started to blow up and I knew when I got to the Center that I was going to have to head back home before I couldn't move.  I limped south, side stepped down the step hill and made it to the house in 1:05.  Took a meloxicam, 5/325 vike and iced.  I wrote about my eating, knit, put a few things on ebay and read until I went to the post office. The knee retreated enough to drive...and while it was still light I parked on the side of the road and double poled on the flats for an hour without incident.  Feeling OK tonight.
Emailed with the girlfriends about our trip to NYC coming up.  I'd be lying if I said I wasn't a bit nervous about driving to Burlington, getting on a plane to the city and spearheading a 4 day outing.  As long as I bring a few just-in-case pills I should be OK.  If it wasn't Linda and Sarah, I wouldn't go.
Most days I'm pretty comfortable.  The message from the physical therapist seemed to be a big set back from which I am finally rebounding.
Quality of life is sitting at about 50% when it is sunny.

Forty Days #2

Plodded south along the river for an hour and a half after the swelling went down enough.  Still uncomfortable but worthwhile. 
Maybe yesterday was a bit much.
The explosion of the left knee today makes me think that if I just have the right knee done, I'll still be hobbling.  Should I have them both done?

Forty-One Days

Less than 6 weeks !  yay.   Six more weeks of my legs continuing to atrophy.

There used to me a muscle there on the outside.

So Saturday I got rescued by a snowmobile and today I skied 2:20...most of it, north of here in the hills.  I was never anywhere I could've gotten stranded.

No pain to speak of and just 1/2 of a meloxicam.  Who knows?  I have a theory.  My knee has been swollen so long and so hard that it seems like things are getting used to being stretched...therefore it's not as painful.

Got a hydrocodone refill (5/325s).  Think I'll try just taking one before bed if I need it....none during the day unless I have an explosion.  I seem to be able to ski with the meloxicam.  I dread going to bed.  Tossing and turning like I do makes the nights so long.

My rented Ford Focus got stuck at the end of the driveway  today with me in it.  I put all of the groceries in my backpack and crutched up the driveway, traded one crutch for a snow shovel, got some ashes and crutched/snowshoveled back to the car.  A few ashes and what seemed like enough shoveling did nothing.  I was sure I'd drive right out.  Finally the neighbors that were watching through their window 10 feet away came out to help and a half hour later I was driving out of the hole we'd dug.  (Thank you neighbors!)  

THEN my knee hurt.

Forty-Two Days

A more cheerful sitting situation there could not be.

I sit on that pink couch all day.  Ignore the wires and it's a pretty happy spot.

I do best if I can stay off my knee other than getting a little exercise.  As much as I hate sitting all day, I know I'm lucky to be in a situation where that is possible.

I have to say I have been pain free all day.  That's before, during and after a 2 hour ski along the river.
Plus 11 minutes of one legged upper body on the rowing machine.

Ice and 1/2 meloxicam.

I'm trying to get up enough courage to post a photo of my muscle-less thighs.  I caught site my right thigh the other day and thought it belonged to someone else.  Like to someone from Biafra.

Forty-Four then Forty-Three Days

Yesterday was a pretty pain free day.  No skiing.  8 minutes of one-leg upper-body-only rowing. March 12 is my surgery and after that I'm on my way to taking being pain free for granted. 

Then today.  If my knee felt this good every day until March 12, I'd be psyched.  I did 20 minutes of one-leg, upper-body-only rowing while watching Reno 9-1-1.  Other than that I was perched on the couch.  Took 1/2 meloxicam then went to Highland Lodge to ski with Vince.  For over an hour of uphill I was totally pain free and I might add that it really couldn't have been more breathtaking.  Then the downhill started.  Against my will I snow-plowed as best I could coming off Barr Hill.  I could feel the knee swelling.   Maybe from being on it that long or maybe from the pressure of the snowplow, I'm not sure, but I wasn't nearly as mobile as I was when we started.  Very slowly, side-stepping down a slight decline with more pain then I'd like to admit, I tried not to bend my knee (easy, because it was too swollen to bend) or grimace.  I pretended I was still in my element so Vince wouldn't stress but he was on to me.  Conversationally as not to arouse panic,  I asked how far it was back to the lodge.  His body language indicated that it wasn't right around the corner and got me thinking that we may have a situation here.  There was a house in the distance.  I couldn't see if the driveway was plowed and didn't know how would I get from the trail to their door if it was...but it was something.  On the ski trail, I was trying to figure out a way to appear as though I was moving a lot faster than I actually was, while in reality I was moving more slowly than anyone had ever moved (you can't even imagine).  Still wearing my no-big-deal demeanor, all I could do was keep moving and hope for the best.   It was hard to ignore Vince's sighs and pretend to not hear the under-his-breath, for my 'benefit' comments that were just loud enough for me to know he was saying something and the exact wording wasn't important. 
Wait. Is that a snowmobile?  Thirty seconds later, rounding the corner pulling a track-setter was the Highland Lodge snowmobile (or an angel) with just enough room for me to fit between a lopper and a shovel.  I hadn't been worried a bit.

I can't say I wasn't worried about a knee explosion, and being out of pain meds once I got settled but, it didn't happen.  Once home, I iced and took the other half of the meloxicam.  It's good.

My plan was...if there was an explosion...to tell Vin I wanted to pick up a few things in Morrisville then sneak off to the emergency room somehow.  Luckily I didn't have to think it through all the way because driving would have been impossible.

Forty-Seven Days

Did 35 minutes of upper body rowing while watching some 'Reno 911'.  Skied 1:35 in 35 degrees after a night of rain.  Took 1/2 of a vike before I went out but not even sure I had to.  The knee is still very swollen, firm and ugly.  Because the general knee swelling and huge baker cyst,  it is impossible to straighten my leg. I have to walk slowly and with a limp.  Nice.

It was very damp last night and this morning but I had very little pain.  Even though my knee is firm (it USED TO jiggle when I tapped it but now it doesn't really move), it seems to be less swollen.  I did ice and took a half of meloxicam today.


Somedays I feel like something as specific as a knee replacement couldn't possibly fix all of the wacky knee things I have going on (firmness, baker cyst, limping) and today was one of those days.

Forty-Eight Days

Did my pain management and skied 1:20 south along the river.  Heaven.  Do I sound like a broken record?  I was actually hoping to get to the point where I sounded like a broken record....i.e. find a routine that worked.  So now I know how I can get away with a little ski, I rented a car so I'm not stranded here on the couch while Vince is in school 9 hours a day and my couch nest is right where I want it...filled with good books, a writing pad and knitting.  Life is good.

I still have pain but it is tolerable.  A week ago I didn't know how I would make it to March 12.
The knee is still very swollen.  I googled 'swollen knee + coagulated blood' and got a couple articles.  One where the guy died and the other where they amputated the leg.   Then I notice the articles were from 1880.

Forty-Nine Days (and some Fifty)

I hope it's not bad luck to miss the post with 50 days to go.  I'm down with the pain management.  Pre-ski vike and 1/2 meloxicam.  Skied 2 hours today and 2:15 yesterday.  Both days started out south along the river.  Yesterday I climbed up out of the valley toward Greensboro which felt fine but coming down, which is generally pretty close to the most fun thing ever possible, was sort of scary.   I've never been aware of my knee in a snowplow and this time it was all I could think about.  The doc says I can't do anything to make the knee worse but what I'm worried about is short-term....having it explode and getting stranded.
You're wondering why I take, what sound like, chances.  I want to be fit for the surgery and I love being out so it's worth the little bit of risk I am taking. 
My knee is swollen as usual. Instead of being mailable, liquidy and loose, it's a bit spongy and sort of hard.  NOT liquidy.  I'm going to do a little research of my own because it's different than it used to be.  The PA and doc aren't concerned. 

Fifty-One Days

Took a 1/2 vicoden** and 1/2 meloxicam an hour before I went out for a ski*.  I headed north from the house which meant there would be a few steep-ish downhills on the way back home.   I'd been avoiding this route due to fairly shitty conditions but the new snow last night should make it more-than-likely doable.  Half way around the loop I was not totally surprised when I felt my knee swelling so I headed home which was the same distance either way. :)  I was out 1:50.  It was delicious.  Sunny, 15 degrees and new snow.  Yum.
I iced when I got home and was very comfortable.  Comfortable enough to do 20 minutes of upper body on the rowing machine and go out again flat along the river for 1:10... with no more medication.  Now, showered and reclined on the couch, I am pretty much pain free.  High pressure*** again but I think the meloxicam may be working for me.
I've 'always' been passionate about getting some exercise everyday and having the surgery coming up, in the spirit of a quicker recovery, I'm even more determined to get out everyday.
*when I mention skiing, it is always Nordic skiing.
**all the books say that after surgery, for PT, the patient should take a pain killer in order to get the most out of the PT session.  Seemed like that same protocol should work for skiing and I want to go into the surgery being as fit as possible.
***I like to think weather has an effect on my arthritis even though I know it probably doesn't.